"So，Ibelieve，donowandthenthosewhoknowhowtoread，brother。"

"Verytrue，Jasper；butyoureallyoughttolearntoread，as，bysodoing，youmightlearnyourdutytowardsyourselves：andyourchiefdutyistotakecareofyourownsouls；didnotthepreachersay，’Inwhatisamanprofited，providedhegainthewholeworld？’"

"Wehavenotmuchoftheworld，brother。"

"Verylittleindeed，Jasper。Didyounotobservehowtheeyesofthewholecongregationwereturnedtowardsourpew，whenthepreachersaid，’Therearesomepeoplewholosetheirsouls，andgetnothinginexchange；whoareoutcast，despised，andmiserable？’Nowwasnotwhathesaidquiteapplicabletothegypsies？"

"Wearenotmiserable，brother。"

"Well，then，yououghttobe，Jasper。Haveyouaninchofgroundofyourown？Areyouoftheleastuse？Areyounotspokenillofbyeverybody？What’sagypsy？"

"What’sthebirdnoisingyonder，brother？"

"Thebird！oh，that’sthecuckootolling；butwhathasthecuckootodowiththematter？"

"We’llsee，brother；what’sthecuckoo？"

"Whatisit？youknowasmuchaboutitasmyself，Jasper。"

"Isn’titakindofroguish，chaffingbird，brother？"

"Ibelieveitis，Jasper。"

"Nobodyknowswhenceitcomes，brother？"

"Ibelievenot，Jasper。"

"Verypoor，brother，notanestofitsown？"

"Sotheysay，Jasper。"

"Witheveryperson’sbadword，brother？"

"Yes，Jasper，everypersonismockingit。"

"Tolerablymerry，brother？"

"Yes，tolerablymerry，Jasper。"

"Ofnouseatall，brother？"

"Nonewhatever，Jasper。"

"Youwouldbegladtogetridofthecuckoos，brother？"

"Why，notexactly，Jasper；thecuckooisapleasant，funnybird，anditspresenceandvoicegiveagreatcharmtothegreentreesandfields；no，Ican’tsayIwishexactlytogetridofthecuckoo。"

"Well，brother，what’saRomanychal？"

"Youmustanswerthatquestionyourself，Jasper。"

"Aroguish，chaffingfellow，a’n’the，brother？"

"Ay，ay，Jasper。"

"Ofnouseatall，brother？"

"Justso，Jasper；Isee—"

"Somethingverymuchlikeacuckoo，brother？"

"Iseewhatyouareafter，Jasper。"

"Youwouldliketogetridofus，wouldn’tyou？"

"Whyno，notexactly。"

"Wearenoornamenttothegreenlanesinspringandsummertime，arewe，brother？andthevoicesofourchies，withtheircukkerinanddukkerin，don’thelptomakethempleasant？"

"Iseewhatyouareat，Jasper。"

"Youwouldwishtoturnthecuckoosintobarn—doorfowls，wouldn’tyou？"

"Can’tsayIshould，Jasper，whateversomepeoplemightwish。"

"Andthechalsandchiesintoradicalweaversandfactorywenches，hey，brother？"

"Can’tsaythatIshould，Jasper。Youarecertainlyapicturesquepeople，andinmanyrespectsanornamentbothtotownandcountry；paintingandlilwritingtooareundergreatobligationstoyou。Whatprettypicturesaremadeoutofyourcampingsandgroupings，andwhatprettybookshavebeenwritteninwhichgypsies，oratleastcreaturesintendedtorepresentgypsies，havebeentheprincipalfigures。I

thinkifwewerewithoutyou，weshouldbegintomissyou。"

"Justasyouwouldthecuckoos，iftheywereallconvertedintobarn—doorfowls。Itellyouwhat，brother；frequently，asIhavesatunderahedgeinspringorsummertime，andheardthecuckoo，Ihavethoughtthatwechalsandcuckoosarealikeinmanyrespects，butespeciallyincharacter。

Everybodyspeaksillofusboth，andeverybodyisgladtoseebothofusagain。"

"Yes，Jasper，butthereissomedifferencebetweenmenandcuckoos；menhavesouls，Jasper！"

"Andwhynotcuckoos，brother？"

"Youshouldnottalkso，Jasper；whatyousayislittleshortofblasphemy。Howshouldabirdhaveasoul？"

"Andhowshouldaman？"

"Oh，weknowverywellthatamanhasasoul。"

"Howdoyouknowit？"

"Weknowverywell。"

"Wouldyoutakeyouroathofit，brother—yourbodilyoath？"

"Why，IthinkImight，Jasper！"

"Didyoueverseethesoul，brother？"

"No，Ineversawit。"

"Thenhowcouldyousweartoit？Aprettyfigureyouwouldmakeinacourtofjustice，tosweartoathingwhichyouneversaw。Holdupyourhead，fellow。Whenandwheredidyouseeit？Nowuponyouroath，fellow，doyoumeantosaythatthisRomanstolethedonkey’sfoal？Oh，there’snooneforcross—questioninglikeCounsellorP—。Ourpeoplewhentheyareinahobblealwaysliketoemployhim，thoughheissomewhatdear。Now，brother，howcanyougetoverthe’uponyouroath，fellow，willyousaythatyouhaveasoul？’"

"Well，wewilltakenooathsonthesubject；butyouyourselfbelieveinthesoul。Ihaveheardyousaythatyoubelieveindukkerin；nowwhatisdukkerinbutthesoulscience？"

"WhendidIsaythatIbelievedinit？"

"Why，afterthatfight，whenyoupointedtothebloodymarkinthecloud，whilstheyouwotofwasgallopinginthebarouchetotheoldtown，amidsttherain—cataracts，thethunder，andflameofheaven。"

"Ihavesomekindofremembranceofit，brother。"

"Then，again，IheardyousaythatthedookofAbershawrodeeverynightonhorsebackdownthewoodedhill。"

"Isay，brother，whatawonderfulmemoryyouhave！"

"IwishIhadnot，Jasper；butIcan’thelpit，itismymisfortune。"

"Misfortune！well，perhapsitis；atanyrateitisveryungenteeltohavesuchamemory。Ihaveheardmywifesaythattoshowyouhavealongmemorylooksveryvulgar；andthatyoucan’tgiveagreaterproofofgentilitythanbyforgettingathingassoonaspossible—moreespeciallyapromise，oranacquaintancewhenhehappenstobeshabby。

Well，brother，Idon’tdenythatImayhavesaidthatI

believeindukkerin，andinAbershaw’sdook，whichyousayishissoul；butwhatIbelieveonemoment，orsayIbelieve，don’tbecertainthatIshallbelievethenext，orsayIdo。"

"Indeed，Jasper，Iheardyousayonapreviousoccasion，onquotingapieceofasong，thatwhenamandiesheiscastintotheearth，andthere’sanendofhim。"

"Idid，didI？Lor’whatamemoryyouhave，brother。ButyouarenotsurethatIholdthatopinionnow。"

"Certainlynot，Jasper。Indeed，aftersuchasermonaswehavebeenhearing，Ishouldbeveryshockedifyouheldsuchanopinion。"

"However，brother，don’tbesureIdonot，howevershockingsuchanopinionmaybetoyou。"

"Whatanincomprehensiblepeopleyouare，Jasper。"

"Weareratherso，brother；indeed，wehaveposedwiserheadsthanyoursbeforenow。"

"Youseemtocareforsolittle，andyetyouroveaboutadistinctrace。"

"Isay，brother！"

"Yes，Jasper。"

"Whatdoyouthinkofourwomen？"

"Theyhavecertainlyverysingularnames，Jasper。"

"Names！Lavengro！However，brother，ifyouhadbeenasfondofthingsasofnames，youwouldneverhavebeenapalofours。"

"Whatdoyoumean，Jasper？"

"A’n’ttheyrumanimals？"

"Theyhavetonguesoftheirown，Jasper。"

"Didyoueverfeeltheirteethandnails，brother？"

"Never，Jasper，saveMrs。Herne’s。Ihavealwaysbeenveryciviltothem，so—"

"Theyletyoualone。Isay，brother，somepartofthesecretisinthem。"

"Theyseemratherflighty，Jasper。"

"Ay，ay，brother！"

"Ratherfondofloosediscourse！"

"Ratherso，brother。"

"Canyoualwaystrustthem，Jasper？"

"Weneverwatchthem，brother。"

"Cantheyalwaystrustyou？"

"Notquitesowellaswecanthem。However，wegetonverywelltogether，exceptMikailiaandherhusband；butMikailiaisacripple，andismarriedtothebeautyoftheworld，soshemaybeexpectedtobejealous—thoughhewouldnotpartwithherforaduchess，nomorethanIwouldpartwithmyrawnie，noranyotherchalwithhis。"

"Ay，butwouldnotthechipartwiththechalforaduke，Jasper？"

"MyPakomovnagaveupthedukeforme，brother。"

"Butsheoccasionallytalksofhim，Jasper。"

"Yes，brother，butPakomovnawasbornonacommonnotfarfromthesignofthegammon。"

"Gammonofbacon，Isuppose。"

"Yes，brother；butgammonlikewisemeans—"

"Iknowitdoes，Jasper；itmeansfun，ridicule，jest；itisanancientNorseword，andisfoundintheEdda。"

"Lor’，brother！howlearnedinlilsyouare！"

"ManywordsofNorsearetobefoundinourvulgarsayings，Jasper；forexample—inthatparticularlyvulgarsayingofours，’Yourmotherisup，’there’sanobleNorseword；

mother，there，meaningnotthefemalewhoboreus，butrageandcholer，asIdiscoveredbyreadingtheSagas，Jasper。"

"Lor’，brother！howbook—learnedyoube。"

"Indifferentlyso，Jasper。Thenyouthinkyoumighttrustyourwifewiththeduke？"

"IthinkIcould，brother，orevenwithyourself。"

"Myself，Jasper！Oh，Inevertroubledmyheadaboutyourwife；butIsupposetherehavebeenloveaffairsbetweengorgiosandRomanychies。Why，novelsarestuffedwithsuchmatters；andthenevenoneofyourownsongssaysso—thesongwhichUrsulawassingingtheotherafternoon。"

"Thatissomewhatofanoldsong，brother，andissungbythechiesasawarningatoursolemnfestivals。"

"Well！butthere’syoursister—in—law，Ursula，herself，Jasper。"

"Ursula，herself，brother？"

"Youweretalkingofmyhavingher，Jasper。"

"Well，brother，whydidn’tyouhaveher？"

"Wouldshehavehadme？"

"Ofcourse，brother。YouaresomuchofaRoman，andspeakRomanysoremarkablywell。"

"Poorthing！shelooksveryinnocent！"

"Remarkablyso，brother！however，thoughnotbornonthesamecommonwithmywife，sheknowsathingortwoofRomanmatters。"

"Ishouldliketoaskheraquestionortwo，Jasper，inconnectionwiththatsong。"

"Youcandonobetter，brother。Hereweareatthecamp。

Aftertea，takeUrsulaunderahedge，andaskheraquestionortwoinconnectionwiththatsong。"

CHAPTERX

SundayEvening—Ursula—ActionatLaw—Meridiana—MarriedAlready。

ITOOKteathateveningwithMr。andMrs。PetulengroandUrsula，outsideoftheirtent。Tawnowasnotpresent，beingengagedwithhiswifeinhisowntabernacle；Sylvesterwasthere，however，lollinglistlesslyupontheground。AsI

lookeduponthisman，IthoughthimoneofthemostdisagreeablefellowsIhadeverseen。Hisfeatureswereugly，and，moreover，asdarkaspepper；and，besidesbeingdark，hisskinwasdirty。Asforhisdress，itwastornandsordid。Hischestwasbroad，andhisarmsseemedpowerful；

but，uponthewhole，helookedaverycaitiff。"Iamsorrythatmanhaslosthiswife，"thoughtI；"forIamsurehewillnevergetanother。"Whatsurprisesmeis，thatheeverfoundawomandisposedtouniteherlotwithhis！

AfterteaIgotupandstrolledaboutthefield。MythoughtswereuponIsopelBerners。Iwonderedwhereshewas，andhowlongshewouldstayaway。Atlengthbecomingtiredandlistless，Ideterminedtoreturntothedingle，andresumethereadingoftheBibleattheplacewhereIhadleftoff。

"WhatbettercouldIdo，"methought，"onaSundayevening？"

Iwasthennearthewoodwhichsurroundedthedingle，butatthatsidewhichwasfarthestfromtheencampment，whichstoodneartheentrance。Suddenly，onturningroundthesoutherncornerofthecopse，whichsurroundedthedingle，IperceivedUrsulaseatedunderathornbush。IthoughtIneversawherlookprettierthanthen，dressedasshewas，inherSunday’sbest。

"Goodevening，Ursula，"saidI；"Ilittlethoughttohavethepleasureofseeingyouhere。"

"Norwouldyou，brother，"saidUrsula，"hadnotJaspertoldmethatyouhadbeentalkingaboutme，andwantedtospeaktomeunderahedge；so，hearingthat，Iwatchedyourmotions，andcamehereandsatdown。"

"Iwasthinkingofgoingtomyquartersinthedingle，toreadtheBible，Ursula，but—"

"Oh，praythen，gotoyourquarters，brother，andreadtheMiduveleskoelil；youcanspeaktomeunderahedgesomeothertime。"

"IthinkIwillsitdownwithyou，Ursula；for，afterall，readinggodlybooksindinglesateve，israthersombrework。

Yes，IthinkIwillsitdownwithyou；"andIsatdownbyherside。

"Well，brother，nowyouhavesatdownwithmeunderthehedge，whathaveyoutosaytome？"

"Why，Ihardlyknow，Ursula。"

"Notknow，brother；aprettyfellowyoutoaskyoungwomentocomeandsitwithyouunderhedges，and，whentheycome，notknowwhattosaytothem。"

"Oh！ah！Iremember；doyouknow，Ursula，thatItakeagreatinterestinyou？"

"Thankye，brother；kindofyou，atanyrate。"

"Youmustbeexposedtoagreatmanytemptations，Ursula。"

"Agreatmanyindeed，brother。Itishard，toseefinethings，suchasshawls，goldwatches，andchainsintheshops，behindthebigglasses，andtoknowthattheyarenotintendedforone。Many’sthetimeIhavebeentemptedtomakeadashatthem；butIbethoughtmyselfthatbysodoingIshouldcutmyhands，besidesbeingalmostcertainofbeinggrabbedandsentacrossthegull’sbathtotheforeigncountry。"

"Thenyouthinkgoldandfinethingstemptations，Ursula？"

"Ofcourse，brother，verygreattemptations；don’tyouthinkthemso？"

"Can’tsayIdo，Ursula。"

"Thenmorefoolyou，brother；buthavethekindnesstotellmewhatyouwouldcallatemptation？"

"Why，forexample，thehopeofhonourandrenown，Ursula。"

"Thehopeofhonourandrenown！verygood，brother；butI

tellyouonething，thatunlessyouhavemoneyinyourpocket，andgoodbroad—clothonyourback，youarenotlikelytoobtainmuchhonourand—whatdoyoucallit？amongstthegorgios，tosaynothingoftheRomanychals。"

"Ishouldhavethought，Ursula，thattheRomanychals，roamingabouttheworldastheydo，freeandindependent，wereabovebeingledbysuchtrifles。"

"Thenyouknownothingofthegypsies，brother；nopeopleoneartharefonderofthosetrifles，asyoucallthem，thantheRomanychals，andmoredisposedtorespectthosewhohavethem。"

"Thenmoneyandfineclotheswouldinduceyoutodoanything，Ursula？"

"Ay，ay，brother，anything。"

"Tochore，Ursula？"

"Likeenough，brother；gypsieshavebeentransportedbeforenowforchoring。"

"Tohokkawar？"

"Ay，ay；Iwastellingdukkerinonlyyesterday，brother。"

"Infact，tobreakthelawineverything？"

"Whoknows，brother，whoknows？asIsaidbefore，goldandfineclothesaregreattemptations。"

"Well，Ursula，Iamsorryforit，Ishouldneverhavethoughtyousodepraved。"

"Indeed，brother。"

"TothinkthatIamseatedbyonewhoiswillingto—to—"

"Goon，brother。"

"Toplaythethief。"

"Goon，brother。"

"Theliar。"

"Goon，brother。"

"The—the—"

"Goon，brother。"

"The—thelubbeny。"

"Thewhat，brother？"saidUrsula，startingfromherseat。

"Why，thelubbeny；don’tyou—"

"Itellyouwhat，brother，"saidUrsula，lookingsomewhatpale，andspeakingverylow，"ifIhadonlysomethinginmyhand，Iwoulddoyouamischief。"

"Why，whatisthematter，Ursula？"saidI；"howhaveI

offendedyou？"

"Howhaveyouoffendedme？Why，didn’tyouinsinivatejustnowthatIwasreadytoplaythe—the—"

"Goon，Ursula。"

"The—the—I’llnotsayit；butIonlywishIhadsomethinginmyhand。"

"IfIhaveoffended，Ursula，Iamverysorryforit；anyoffenceImayhavegivenyouwasfromwantofunderstandingyou。Come，praybeseated，Ihavemuchtoquestionyouabout—totalktoyouabout。"

"Seated，notI！Itwasonlyjustnowthatyougavemetounderstandthatyouwasashamedtobeseatedbyme，athief，aliar。"

"Well，didyounotalmostgivemetounderstandthatyouwereboth，Ursula？"

"Idon’tmuchcarebeingcalledathiefandaliar，"saidUrsula；"apersonmaybealiarandthief，andyetaveryhonestwoman，but—"

"Well，Ursula。"

"Itellyouwhat，brother，ifyoueversinivateagainthatI

couldbethethirdthing，sohelpmeduvel！I’lldoyouamischief。BymyGodIwill！"

"Well，Ursula，IassureyouthatIshallsinivate，asyoucallit，nothingofthekindaboutyou。Ihavenodoubt，fromwhatyouhavesaid，thatyouareaveryparagonofvirtue—aperfectLucretia；but—"

"MynameisUrsula，brother，andnotLucretia：Lucretiaisnotofourfamily，butoneoftheBucklands；shetravelsaboutOxfordshire；yetIamasgoodassheanyday。"

"Lucretia；howodd！Wherecouldshehavegotthatname？

Well，Imakenodoubt，Ursula，thatyouarequiteasgoodasshe，andsheashernamesakeofancientRome；butthereisamysteryinthissamevirtue，Ursula，whichIcannotfathom；

howathiefandaliarshouldbeable，orindeedwilling，topreservehervirtueiswhatIdon’tunderstand。Youconfessthatyouareveryfondofgold。Now，howisitthatyoudon’tbarteryourvirtueforgoldsometimes？Iamaphilosopher，Ursula，andliketoknoweverything。Youmustbeeverynowandthenexposedtogreattemptation，Ursula；

foryouareofabeautycalculatedtocaptivateallhearts。

Come，sitdownandtellmehowyouareenabledtoresistsuchatemptationasgoldandfineclothes？"

"Well，brother，"saidUrsula，"asyousayyoumeannoharm，I

willsitdownbesideyou，andenterintodiscoursewithyou；

butIwillupholdthatyouarethecoolesthandthatIevercamenigh，andsaythecoolestthings。"

AndthereuponUrsulasatdownbymyside。

"Well，Ursula，wewill，ifyouplease，discourseonthesubjectofyourtemptations。Isupposethatyoutravelverymuchabout，andshowyourselfinallkindsofplaces？"

"Inallkinds，brother；Itravels，asyousay，verymuchabout，attendsfairsandraces，andentersboothsandpublic—

houses，whereItellsfortunes，andsometimesdancesandsings。"

"Anddonotpeopleoftenaddressyouinaveryfreemanner？"

"Frequently，brother；andIgivethemtolerablyfreeanswers。"

"Dopeopleeveroffertomakeyoupresents？Imeanpresentsofvalue，suchas—"

"Silkhandkerchiefs，shawls，andtrinkets；veryfrequently，brother。"

"Andwhatdoyoudo，Ursula？"

"Itakeswhatpeopleoffersme，brother，andstowsitawayassoonasIcan。"

"Well，butdon’tpeopleexpectsomethingfortheirpresents？

Idon’tmeandukkerin，dancing，andthelike；butsuchamoderateandinnocentthingasachoomer，Ursula？"

"Innocentthing，doyoucallit，brother？"

"Theworldcallsitso，Ursula。Well，dothepeoplewhogiveyouthefinethingsneverexpectachoomerinreturn？"

"Veryfrequently，brother。"

"Anddoyouevergrantit？"

"Never，brother。"

"Howdoyouavoidit？"

"Igetsawayassoonaspossible，brother。Iftheyfollowsme，Itriestobafflethem，bymeansofjestsandlaughter；

andiftheypersist，Iusesbadandterriblelanguage，ofwhichIhaveplentyinstore。"

"Butifyourterriblelanguagehasnoeffect？"

"ThenIscreamsfortheconstable，andifhecomesnot，I

usesmyteethandnails。"

"Andaretheyalwayssufficient？"

"Ihaveonlyhadtousethemtwice，brother；butthenIfoundthemsufficient。"

"Butsupposethepersonwhofollowedyouwashighlyagreeable，Ursula？Ahandsomeyoungofficeroflocalmilitia，forexample，alldressedinLincolngreen，wouldyoustillrefusehimthechoomer？"

"Wemakesnodifference，brother；thedaughtersofthegypsy—

fathermakesnodifference；andwhat’smore，seesnone。"

"Well，Ursula，theworldwillhardlygiveyoucreditforsuchindifference。"

"Whatcareswefortheworld，brother！wearenotoftheworld。"

"Butyourfathers，brothers，anduncles，giveyoucredit，I

suppose，Ursula。"

"Ay，ay，brother，ourfathers，brothers，andcokosgivesusallmannerofcredit；forexample，Iamtellingliesanddukkerininapublic—housewheremybatuorcoko—perhapsboth—areplayingonthefiddle；well，mybatuandmycokobeholdsmeamongstthepublic—housecrew，talkingnonsenseandhearingnonsense；buttheyareundernoapprehension；andpresentlytheyseesthegood—lookingofficerofmilitia，inhisgreensandLincolns，getupandgivemeawink，andIgooutwithhimabroad，intothedarknightperhaps；well，mybatuandmycokogoesonfiddlingjustasifIweresixmilesoffasleepinthetent，andnotoutinthedarkstreetwiththelocalofficer，withhisLincolnsandhisgreens。"

"Theyknowtheycantrustyou，Ursula？"

"Ay，ay，brother；and，what’smore，IknowsIcantrustmyself。"

"Soyouwouldmerelygoouttomakeafoolofhim，Ursula？"

"Merelygoouttomakeafoolofhim，brother，Iassureyou。"

"Butsuchproceedingsreallyhaveanoddlook，Ursula。"

"Amongstgorgios，veryso，brother。"

"Well，itmustberatherunpleasanttoloseone’scharacterevenamongstgorgios，Ursula；andsupposetheofficer，outofrevengeforbeingtrickedanddupedbyyou，weretosayofyouthethingthatisnot，weretomeetyouontherace—

coursethenextday，andboastofreceivingfavourswhichheneverhad，amidstaknotofjeeringmilitia—men，howwouldyouproceed，Ursula？wouldyounotbeabashed？"

"Bynomeans，brother；Ishouldbringmyactionoflawagainsthim。"

"Youractionatlaw，Ursula？"

"Yes，brother，Ishouldgiveawhistle，whereuponallone’scokosandbatus，andallmynearanddistantrelations，wouldleavetheirfiddling，dukkerin，andhorse—dealing，andcomeflockingaboutme。’What’sthematter，Ursula？’saysmycoko。’Nothingatall，’Ireplies，’saveandexceptthatgorgio，inhisgreensandhisLincolns，saysthatIhaveplayedthe—withhim。’’Oho，hedoes，Ursula，’saysmycoko，’tryyouractionoflawagainsthim，mylamb，’andheputssomethingprivilyintomyhands；whereuponIgoescloseuptothegrinninggorgio，andstaringhimintheface，withmyheadpushedforward，Icriesout：’YousayIdidwhatwaswrongwithyoulastnightwhenIwasoutwithyouabroad？’

’Yes，’saysthelocalofficer，’Isaysyoudid，’lookingdownallthetime。’Youarealiar，’saysI，andforthwithI

breakshisheadwiththestickwhichIholdsbehindme，andwhichmycokohasconveyedprivilyintomyhand。"