Fee’sdresswasofcrepeinapeculiarlyrichshadeofblue-grey，andsuitedher，fallingtothefloorinsoftfolds，lowofnecklinebuttightlysleevedtothewrists，lavishlybeaded，muchinthestyleofQueenMary。Likethatimperiouslady，shehadherhairdonehighinbacksweepingpuffs，andtheGillystorehadproducedanimitationpearlchokerandearringswhichwouldfoolallbutacloseinspection。Amagnificentostrich-featherfandyedthesamecolorashergowncompletedtheensemble，notsoostentatiousasitappearedatfirstglance；theweatherwasunusuallyhot，andatsevenintheeveningitwasstillwelloverahundreddegrees。

WhenFeeandPaddyemergedfromtheirroom，theboysgaped。Inalltheirlivestheyhadneverseentheirparentssoregallyhandsome，soforeign。Paddylookedhissixty-oneyears，butinsuchadistinguishedwayhemighthavebeenastatesman；whereasFeeseemedsuddenlytenyearsyoungerthanherforty-eight，beautiful，vital，magicallysmiling。JimsandPatsyburstintoshriekingtears，refusingtolookatMumandDaddyuntiltheyrevertedtonormal，andintheflurryofconsternationdignitywasforgotten；MumandDaddybehavedastheyalwaysdid，andsoonthetwinswerebeaminginadmiration。

ButitwasatMeggieeveryonestaredthelongest。Perhapsrememberingherowngirlhood，andangeredthatalltheotheryoungladiesinvitedhadorderedtheirgownsfromSydney，theGillydressmakerhadputherheartintoMeggie’sdress。Itwassleevelessandhadalow，drapedneckline；Feehadbeendubious，butMeggiehadimploredandthedressmakerassuredherallthegirlswouldbewearingthesamesortofthing-didshewantherdaughterlaughedatforbeingcountrifiedanddowdy？SoFeehadgiveningracefully。Ofcrepegeorgette，aheavychiffon，thedresswasonlyslightlyfittedatthewaist，butsashedaroundthehipswiththesamematerial。Itwasadusky，palepinkishgrey，thecolorthatinthosedayswascalledashesofroses；betweenthemthedressmakerandMeggiehadembroideredtheentiregownintinypinkrosebuds。AndMeggiehadcutherhairintheclosestwayshecouldtotheshinglecreepingeventhroughtheranksofGillygirls。Itcurledfartoomuchforfashion，ofcourse，butitsuitedherbettershortthanlong。

PaddyopenedhismouthtoroarbecauseshewasnothislittlegirlMeggie，butshutitagainwiththewordsunuttered；hehadlearnedfromthatsceneinthepresbyterywithFranklongago。No，hecouldn’tkeepheralittlegirlforever；shewasayoungwomanandshyoftheamazingtransformationhermirrorhadshownher。Whymakeitharderforthepoorlittlebeggar？Heextendedhishandtoher，smilingtenderly。"Oh，Meggie，you’resolovely！Comeon，I’mgoingtoescortyoumyself，andBobandJackshalltakeyourmother。"

Shewasjustamonthshortofseventeen，andforthefirsttimeinhislifePaddyfeltreallyold。Butshewasthetreasureofhisheart；nothingshouldspoilherfirstgrown-upparty。

Theywalkedtothehomesteadslowly，fartooearlyforthefirstguests；theyweretodinewithMaryCarsonandbeonhandtoreceivewithher。Noonewanteddirtyshoes，butamilethroughDroghedadustmeantapauseinthecookhousetopolishshoes，brushdustfromtrouserbottomsandtrailinghems。FatherRalphwasinhissoutaneasusual；nomaleeveningfashioncouldhavesuitedhimhalfsowellasthatseverelycutrobewithitsslightlyflaringlines，theinnumerablelittleblackclothbuttonsupitsfrontfromhemtocollar，thepurple-edgedmonsignor’ssash。MaryCarsonhaschosentowearwhitesatin，whitelaceandwhiteostrichfeathers。Feestaredatherstupidly，shockedoutofherhabitualindifference。Itwassoincongruouslybridal，sogrosslyunsuitable——whyonearthhadshetrickedherselfoutlikearaddledoldspinsterplayactingatbeingmarried？Shehadgotveryfatoflate，whichdidn’timprovematters。ButPaddyseemedtoseenothingamiss；hestrodeforwardtotakehissister’shands，beaming。Whatadearfellowhewas，thoughtFatherRalphashewatchedthelittlescene，halfamused，halfdetached。

"Well，Mary！Howfineyoulook！Likeayounggirl！"IntruthshelookedalmostexactlylikethatfamousphotographofQueenVictoriatakennotlongbeforeshedied。Thetwoheavylineswerethereoneithersideofthemasterfulnose，themulishmouthwassetindomitably，theslightlyprotrudingandglacialeyesfixedwithoutblinkingonMeggie。FatherRalph’sownbeautifuleyespassedfromniecetoaunt，andbacktonieceagain。

MaryCarsonsmiledatPaddy，andputherhandonhisarm。"Youmaytakemeintodinner，Padraic。FatherdeBricassartwillescortFiona，andtheboysmustmakedowithMeghannbetweenthem。"OverhershouldershelookedbackatMeggie。"Doyoudancetonight，Meghann？"

"She’stooyoung，Mary，she’snotyetseventeen，"saidPaddyquickly，rememberinganotherparentalshortcoming；noneofhischildrenhadbeentaughttodance。

"Whatapity，"saidMaryCarson。

Itwasasplendid，sumptuous，brilliant，gloriousparty；atleast，theyweretheadjectivesmostbandiedabout。RoyalO’MarawastherefromInishmurray，twohundredmilesaway；hecamethefarthestwithhiswife，sonsandlonedaughter，thoughnotbymuch。Gillypeoplethoughtlittleoftravelingtwohundredmilestoacricketmatch，letaloneaparty。DuncanGordon，fromEach-Uisge；noonehadeverpersuadedhimtoexplainwhyhehadcalledhisstationsofarfromtheoceantheScotsGaelicforaseahorse。MartinKing，hiswife，hissonAnthonyandMrs。Anthony；hewasGilly’sseniorsquatter，sinceMaryCarsoncouldnotbesocalled，beingawoman。EvanPugh，fromBraichyPwll，whichthedistrictpronouncedBrakeypull。

DominicO’RourkefromDibban-Dibban，HorryHopetonfromBeel-Beel；anddozensmore。

TheywerealmosttothelastfamilypresentCatholic，andfewsportedAnglo-Saxonnames；therewasaboutanequaldistributionofIrish，ScottishandWelsh。No，theycouldnothopeforhomeruleintheoldcountry，nor，ifCatholicinScotlandorWales，formuchsympathyfromtheProtestantindigenes。ButhereinthethousandsofsquaremilesaroundGillanbonetheywerelordstothumbtheirnosesatBritishlords，mastersofalltheysurveyed；Drogheda，thebiggestproperty，wasgreaterinareathanseveralEuropeanprincipalities。Monegasqueprincelings，Liechtensteiniandukes，be-ware！MaryCarsonwasgreater。SotheywhirledinwaltzestothesleekSydneybandandstoodbackindulgentlytowatchtheirchildrendancetheCharleston，atethelobsterpattiesandthechilledrawoysters，drankthefifteen-year-oldFrenchchampagneandthetwelve-year-oldsingle-maltScotch。Ifthetruthwereknown，theywouldratherhaveeatenroastlegoflamborcornedbeef，andmuchpreferredtodrinkcheap，verypotentBundabergrumorGraftonbitterfromthebarrel。Butitwasnicetoknowthebetterthingsoflifeweretheirsfortheasking。

Yes，therewereleanyears，manyofthem。Thewoolcheckswerecarefullyhoardedinthegoodyearstoguardagainstthedepredationsofthebad，fornoonecouldpredicttherain。Butitwasagoodperiod，hadbeenforsometime，andtherewaslittletospendthemoneyoninGilly。Oh，onceborntotheblacksoilplainsoftheGreatNorthwesttherewasnoplaceonearthlikeit。Theymadenonostalgicpilgrimagesbacktotheoldcountry；ithaddonenothingforthemsavediscriminateagainstthemfortheirreligiousconvictions，whereAustraliawastooCatholicacountrytodiscriminate。AndtheGreatNorthwestwashome。

Besides，MaryCarsonwasfootingthebilltonight。Shecouldwellaffordit。RumorsaidshewasabletobuyandselltheKingofEngland。Shehadmoneyinsteel，moneyinsilver-lead-zinc，moneyincopperandgold，moneyinahundreddifferentthings，mostlythesortofthingsthatliterallyandmetaphoricallymademoney。Droghedahadlongsinceceasedtobethemainsourceofherincome；itwasnomorethanaprofitablehobby。

FatherRalphdidn’tspeakdirectlytoMeggieduringdinner，nordidheafterward；throughouttheeveninghestudiouslyignoredher。Hurt，hereyessoughthimwhereverhewasinthereceptionroom。Awareofit，heachedtostopbyherchairandexplaintoherthatitwouldnotdoherreputation(orhis)anygoodifhepaidhermoreattentionthanhedid，say，MissCarmichael，MissGordonorMissO’Mara。LikeMeggiehedidn’tdance，andlikeMeggiethereweremanyeyesonhim；theywereeasilythetwomostbeautifulpeopleintheroom。

Halfofhimhatedherappearancetonight，theshorthair，thelovelydress，thedaintyashes-of-rosessilkslipperswiththeirtwo-inchheels；shewasgrowingtaller，developingaveryfemininefigure。Andhalfofhimwasbusybeingterrificallyproudofthefactthatsheshonealltheotheryoungladiesdown。MissCarmichaelhadthepatricianfeatures，butlackedthespecialgloryofthatred-goldhair；MissKinghadexquisiteblondtresses，butlackedthelissomebody；MissMackailwasstunningofbody，butinthefaceverylikeahorseeatinganapplethroughawire-nettingfence。Yethisoverallreactionwasoneofdisappointment，andananguishedwishtoturnbackthecalendar。Hedidn’twantMeggietogrowup，hewantedthelittlegirlhecouldtreatashistreasuredbabe。OnPaddy’sfaceheglimpsedanexpressionwhichmirroredhisownthoughts，andsmiledfaintly。Whatblissitwouldbeifjustonceinhislifehecouldshowhisfeelings！Buthabit，traininganddiscretionweretooingrained。

Astheeveningworeonthedancinggrewmoreandmoreuninhibited，theliquorchangedfromchampagneandwhiskeytorumandbeer，andproceedingssettleddowntosomethingmorelikeawoolshedball。BytwointhemorningonlyatotalabsenceofstationhandsandworkinggirlscoulddistinguishitfromtheusualentertainmentsoftheGillydistrict，whichwerestrictlydemocratic。

PaddyandFeewerestillinattendance，butpromptlyatmidnightBobandJackleftwithMeggie。NeitherFeenorPaddynoticed；theywereenjoyingthemselves。Iftheirchildrencouldn’tdance，theycould，anddid；witheachothermostly，seemingtothewatchingFatherRalphsuddenlymuchmoreattunedtoeachother，perhapsbecausethetimestheyhadanopportunitytorelaxandenjoyeachotherwererare。Heneverrememberedseeingthemwithoutatleastonechildsomewherearound，andthoughtitmustbehardontheparentsoflargefamilies，neverabletosnatchmomentsalonesaveinthebedroom，wheretheymightexcusablyhaveotherthingsthanconversationontheirminds。Paddywasalwayscheerfulandjolly，butFeetonightalmostliterallyshone，andwhenPaddywenttobegadutydanceofsomesquatter’swife，shedidn’tlackeagerpartners；thereweremanymuchyoungerwomenwiltingonchairsaroundtheroomwhowerenotsosoughtafter。

However，FatherRalph’smomentstoobservetheClearyparentswerelimited。FeelingtenyearsyoungeroncehesawMeggieleavetheroom，hebecameagreatdealmoreanimatedandflabbergastedtheMissesHopeton，Mackail，GordonandO’Marabydancing-andextremelywell-theBlackBottomwithMissCarmichael。Butafterthathegaveeveryunattachedgirlintheroomherturn，evenpoorhomelyMissPugh，andsincebythistimeeveryonewasthoroughlyrelaxedandoozinggoodwill，noonecondemnedthepriestonebit。Infact，hiszealandkindnessweremuchadmiredandcommentedupon。NoonecouldsaytheirdaughterhadnothadanopportunitytodancewithFatherdeBricassart。

Ofcourse，haditnotbeenaprivatepartyhecouldnothavemadeamovetowardthedancefloor，butitwassonicetoseesuchafinemanreallyenjoyhimselfforonce。

Atthreeo’clockMaryCarsonrosetoherfeetandyawned。"No，don’tstopthefestivities！IfI’mtiredwhichIam-Icangotobed，whichiswhatI’mgoingtodo。Butthere’splentyoffoodanddrink，thebandhasbeenengagedtoplayaslongassomeonewantstodance，andalittlenoisewillonlyspeedmeintomydreams。Father，wouldyouhelpmeupthestairs，please？"Onceoutsidethereceptionroomshedidnotturntothemajesticstaircase，butguidedthepriesttoherdrawingroom，leaningheavilyonhisarm。Itsdoorhadbeenlocked；shewaitedwhileheusedthekeyshehandedhim，thenprecededhiminside。

"Itwasagoodparty，Mary，"hesaid。

"Mylast。"

"Don’tsaythat，mydear。"

"Whynot？I’mtiredofliving，Ralph，andI’mgoingtostop。"Herhardeyesmocked。"Doyoudoubtme？ForoverseventyyearsI’vedonepreciselywhatIwantedtodowhenIwantedtodoit，soifDeaththinkshe’stheonetochoosethetimeofmygoing，he’sverymuchmistaken。I’lldiewhenIchoosethetime，andnosuicide，either。It’sourwilltolivekeepsuskicking，Ralph；itisn’thardtostopifwereallywantto。I’mtired，andIwanttostop。Verysimple。"

Hewastired，too；notofliving，exactly，butoftheendlessfacade，theclimate，thelackoffriendswithcommoninterests，himself。Theroomwasonlyfaintlylitbyatallkerosenelampofpricelessrubyglass，anditcasttransparentcrimsonshadowsonMaryCarson’sface，conjuringoutofherintractablebonessomethingmorediabolical。Hisfeetandbackached；itwasalongtimesincehehaddancedsomuch，thoughhepridedhimselfonkeepingupwithwhateverwasthelatestfad。Thirty-fiveyearsofage，acountrymonsignor，andasapowerintheChurch？Finishedbeforehehadbegun。Oh，thedreamsofyouth！Andthecarelessnessofyouth’stongue，thehotnessofyouth’stemper。Hehadnotbeenstrongenoughtomeetthetest。Buthewouldnevermakethatmistakeagain。Never，never……

Hemovedrestlessly，sighed；whatwastheuse？Thechancewouldnotcomeagain。Timehefacedthatfactsquarely，timehestoppedhopinganddreaming。"Doyouremembermysaying，Ralph，thatI’dbeatyou，thatI’dhoistyouwithyourownpetard？"

Thedryoldvoicesnappedhimoutofthereveriehiswearinesshadinduced。HelookedacrossatMaryCarsonandsmiled。

"DearMary，Ineverforgetanythingyousay。WhatIwouldhavedonewithoutyouthesepastsevenyearsIdon’tknow。Yourwit，yourmalice，yourperception……"

"IfI’dbeenyoungerI’dhavegotyouinadifferentway，Ralph。You’llneverknowhowI’velongedtothrowthirtyyearsofmylifeoutthewindow。IftheDevilhadcometomeandofferedtobuymysoulforthechancetobeyoungagain，I’dhavesolditinasecond，andnotstupidlyregrettedthebargainlikethatoldidiotFaust。ButnoDevil。Ireallycan’tbringmyselftobelieveinGodortheDevil，youknow。I’veneverseenascrapofevidencetotheeffecttheyexist。Haveyou？"

"No。Butbeliefdoesn’trestonproofofexistence，Mary。Itrestsonfaith，andfaithisthetouchstoneoftheChurch。Withoutfaith，thereisnothing。"

"Averyephemeraltenet。"

"Perhaps。Faith’sborninamanorawoman，Ithink。Formeit’saconstantstruggle，Iadmitthat，butI’llnevergiveup。"

"Iwouldliketodestroyyou。"

Hisblueeyeslaughed，greyedinthelight。"Oh，mydearMary！Iknowthat。"

"Butdoyouknowwhy？"

Aterrifyingtendernesscreptagainsthim，almostinsidehim，exceptthathefoughtitfiercely。"Iknowwhy，Mary，andbelieveme，I’msorry。"

"Besidesyourmother，howmanywomenhavelovedyou？""Didmymotherloveme，Iwonder？Sheendedinhatingme，anyway。Mostwomendo。MynameoughttohavebeenHippolytos。"

"Ohhhhhh！Thattellsmealot！"

"Astootherwomen，IthinkonlyMeggie……Butshe’salittlegirl。It’sprobablynotanexaggerationtosayhundredsofwomenhavewantedme，butlovedme？Idoubtitverymuch。"

"Ihavelovedyou，"shesaidpathetically。

"No，youhaven’t。I’mthegoadofyouroldage，that’sall。WhenyoulookatmeIremindyouofwhatyoucannotdo，becauseofage。"

"You’rewrong。Ihavelovedyou。God，howmuch！Doyouthinkmyyearsautomaticallyprecludeit？Well，FatherdeBricassart，letmetellyousomething。InsidethisstupidbodyI’mstillyoung-Istillfeel，Istillwant，Istilldream，Istillkickupmyheelsandchafeatrestrictionslikemybody。OldageisthebitterestvengeanceourvengefulGodinflictsuponus。Whydoesn’tHeageourmindsaswell？"Sheleanedbackinherchairandclosedhereyes，herteethshowingsourly。"IshallgotoHell，ofcourse。ButbeforeIdo，IhopeIgetthechancetotellGodwhatamean，spiteful，pitifulapologyofaGodHeis！"

"Youwereawidowtoolong。Godgaveyoufreedomofchoice，Mary。Youcouldhaveremarried。Ifyouchosenottoremarryandinconsequenceyou’vebeenintolerablylonely，it’syourowndoing，notGod’s。"。Foramomentshesaidnothing，herhandsgrippingthechairarmshard；thenshebegantorelax，andopenedhereyes。Theyglitteredinthelamplightredly，butnotwithtears；withsomethingharder，morebrilliant。Hecaughthisbreath，feltfear。Shelookedlikeaspider。

"Ralph，onmydeskisanenvelope。Wouldyoubringittome，please？"Achingandafraid，hegotupandwenttoherdesk，liftedtheletter，eyeditcuriously。Thefaceofitwasblank，butthebackhadbeenproperlysealedwithredwaxandherram’sheadsealwiththebigD。Hebroughtittoherandhelditout，butshewavedhimtohisseatwithouttakingit。"It’syours，"shesaid，andgiggled。"Theinstrumentofyourfate，Ralph，that’swhatitis。Mylastandmosttellingthrustinourlongbattle。WhatapityIwon’tbeheretoseewhathappens。ButIknowwhatwillhappen，becauseIknowyou，IknowyoumuchbetterthanyouthinkIdo。Insufferableconceit！Insidethatenvelopeliesthefateofyourlifeandyoursoul。ImustloseyoutoMeggie，butI’vemadesureshedoesn’tgetyou，either。""WhydoyouhateMeggieso？"

"Itoldyouoncebefore。Becauseyouloveher。"

"Notinthatway！She’sthechildIcanneverhave，theroseofmylife。Meggieisanidea，Mary，anidea！"

But。theoldwomansneered。"Idon’twanttotalkaboutyourpreciousMeggie！Ishallneverseeyouagain，soIdon’twanttowastemytimewithyoutalkingabouther。Theletter。Iwantyoutoswearonyourvowsasapriestthatyoudon’topenituntilyou’veseenmydeadbodyforyourself，butthenthatyouopenitimmediately，beforeyouburyme。Swear！""There’snoneedtoswear，Mary。I’lldoasyouask。"

"SweartomeorI’lltakeitback！"

Heshrugged。"Allright，then。OnmyvowsasapriestIswearit。NottoopentheletteruntilI’veseenyoudead，andthentoopenitbeforeyou’reburied"

"Good，good！"

"Mary，pleasedon’tworry。Thisisafancyofyours，nomore。Inthemorningyou’lllaughatit。"

"Iwon’tseethemorning。I’mgoingtodietonight；I’mnotweakenoughtowaitonthepleasureofseeingyouagain。Whatananticlimax！I’mgoingtobednow。Willyoutakemetothetopofthestairs？"

Hedidn’tbelieveher，buthecouldseeitservednopurposetoargue，andshewasnotinthemoodtobejolliedoutofit。OnlyGoddecidedwhenonewoulddie，unless，ofthefreewillHehadgiven，onetookone’sownlife。Andshehadsaidshewouldn’tdothat。Sohehelpedherpantupthestairsandatthetoptookherhandsinhis，benttokissthem。Shepulledthemaway。"No，nottonight。Onmymouth，Ralph！Kissmymouthasifwewerelovers！"

Bythebrilliantlightofthechandelier，litforthepartywithfourhundredwaxcandles，shesawthedisgustinhisface，theinstinctiverecoil；shewantedtodiethen，wantedtodiesobadlyshecouldnotwait。

"Mary，I’mapriest！Ican’t！"

Shelaughedshrilly，eerily。"Oh，Ralph，whatashamyouare！Shamman，shampriest！Andtothinkonceyouactuallyhadthetemeritytooffertomakelovetome！wereyousopositiveI’drefuse？HowIwishIhadn’t！I’dgivemysoultoseeyouwriggleoutofitifwecouldhavethatnightbackagain！Sham，sham，sham！That’sallyouare，Ralph！Animpotent，uselesssham！Impotentmanandimpotentpriest！Idon’tthinkyoucouldgetitupandkeepitupfortheBlessedVirginherself！Haveyouevermanagedtogetitup，FatherdeBricassart？Sham！"

Outsideitwasnotyetdawn，orthelighteningbeforeit。Darknesslaysoft，thickandveryhotoverDrogheda。Therevelswerebecomingextremelynoisy；ifthehomesteadhadpossessednext-doorneighborsthepolicewouldhavebeencalledlongsince。Someonewasvomitingcopiouslyandrevoltinglyontheveranda，andunderawispybottlebrushtwoindistinctformswerelockedtogether。FatherRalphavoidedthevomiterandthelovers，treadingsilentlyacrossthespringynew-mownlawnwithsuchtormentinhismindhedidnotknoworcarewherehewasgoing。Onlythathewantedtobeawayfromher，theawfuloldspiderwhowasconvincedshewasspinningherdeathcocoononthisexquisitenight。Atsuchanearlyhourtheheatwasnotexhausting；therewasafaint，heavystirringintheair，andastealingoflanguorousperfumesfromboroniaandroses，theheavenlystillnessonlytropicalandsubtropicallatitudescaneverknow。Oh，God，tobealive，tobereallyalive！Toembracethenight，andliving，andbefree！

Hestoppedonthefarsideofthelawnandstoodlookingupatthesky，aninstinctiveaerialsearchingforGod。Yes，uptheresomewhere，betweenthewinkingpointsoflightsopureandunearthly；whatwasitaboutthenightsky？Thatthebluelidofdaywaslifted，amanpermittedglimpsesofeternity？NothingsavewitnessingthestrewnvistaofthestarscouldconvinceamanthattimelessnessandGodexisted。She’sright，ofcourse。Asham，atotalsham。Nopriest，noman。Onlysomeonewhowishesheknewhowtobeeither。No！Noteither！Priestandmancannotcoexist-tobeamanistobenopriest。WhydidIevertanglemyfeetinherweb？Herpoisonisstrong，perhapsstrongerthanIguess。What’sintheletter？HowlikeMarytobaitme！Howmuchdoessheknow，howmuchdoesshesimplyguess？Whatistheretoknow，orguess？Onlyfutility，andloneliness。Doubt，pain。Alwayspain。Yetyou’rewrong，Mary。Icangetitup。It’sjustthatIdon’tchooseto，thatI’vespentyearsprovingtomyselfitcanbecontrolled，dominated，subjugated。Forgettingitupistheactivityofaman，andIamapriest。

Someonewasweepinginthecemetery。Meggie，ofcourse。Nooneelsewouldthinkofit。Hepickeduptheskirtsofhissoutaneandsteppedoverthewroughtironrailing，feelingitwasinevitablethathehadnotyetdonewithMeggieonthisnight。Ifheconfrontedoneofthewomeninhislife，hemustalsodealwiththeother。Hisamuseddetachmentwascomingback；shecouldnotdispersethatforlong，theoldspider。Thewickedoldspider。Godrother，Godrother！

"DarlingMeggie，don’tcry，"hesaid，sittingonthedew-wetgrassbesideher。"Here，I’llbetyoudon’thaveadecenthandkerchief。Womenneverdo。Takemineanddryyoureyeslikeagoodgirl。"

Shetookitanddidasshewastold。

"Youhaven’tevenchangedoutofyourfinery。Haveyoubeensittingheresincemidnight？"

"Yes。"

"DoBobandJackknowwhereyouare？"

"ItoldthemIwasgoingtobed。"

"What’sthematter，Meggie？"

"Youdidn’tspeaktometonight！"

"Ali！Ithoughtthatmightbeit。Come，Meggie，lookatme！"Awayintheeastwasapearlyluster，afleeingoftotaldarkness，andtheDroghedaroosterswereshriekinganearlywelcometothedawn。Sohecouldseethatnotevenprotractedtearscoulddimthelovelinessofhereyes。"Meggie，youwerebyfartheprettiestgirlattheparty，andit’swellknownthatIcometoDroghedamoreoftenthanIneed。IamapriestandthereforeIoughttobeabovesuspicion-abitlikeCaesar’swifecombI’mafraidpeopledon’tthinksopurely。AspriestsgoI’myoung，andnotbad-looking。"HepausedtothinkhowMaryCarsonwouldhavegreetedthatbitofunderstatement，andlaughedsoundlessly。"IfIhadpaidyouaskerrickofattentionitwouldhavebeenalloverGillyinrecordtime。Everypartylineinthedistrictwouldhavebeenbuzzingwithit。DoyouknowwhatImean？"Sheshookherhead；thecroppedcurlsweregrowingbrighterintheadvancinglight。

"Well，you’reyoungtocometoknowledgeofthewaysoftheworld，butyou’vegottolearn，andital-waysseemstobemyprovincetoteachyou，doesn’tit？ImeanpeoplewouldbesayingIwasinterestedinyouasaman，notasapriest。"

"Father！"

"Dreadful，isn’tit？"Hesmiled。"Butthat’swhatpeoplewouldsay，Iassureyou。Yousee，Meggie，you’renotalittlegirlanymore，you’reayounglady。Butyouhaven’tlearnedyettohideyouraffectionforme，sohadIstoppedtospeaktoyouwithallthosepeoplelookingon，you’dhavestaredatmeinawaywhichmighthavebeenmisconstrued。"

Shewaslookingathimoddly，asuddeninscrutabilityshutteringhergaze，thenabruptlysheturnedherheadandpresentedhimwithherprofile。"Yes，Isee。Iwassillynottohaveseenit。"

"Nowdon’tyouthinkit’stimeyouwenthome？Nodoubteveryonewillsleepin，butifsomeone’sawakeattheusualtimeyou’llbeinthesoup。Andyoucan’tsayyou’vebeenwithme，Meggie，eventoyourownfamily。"Shegotupandstoodstaringdownathim。"I’mgoing，Father。ButIwishtheyknewyoubetter，thenthey’dneverthinksuchthingsofyou。Itisn’tinyou，isit？"

Forsomereasonthathurt，hurtrightdowntohissoulasMaryCarson’scrueltauntshadnot。"No，Meggie，you’reright。Itisn’tinme。"Hesprangup，smilingwryly。"WouldyouthinkitstrangeifIsaidIwisheditwas？"Heputahandtohishead。"No，Idon’twishitwasatall！Gohome，Meggie，gohome！"

Herfacewassad。"Goodnight，Father。"

Hetookherhandsinhis，bentandkissedthem。"Goodnight，dearestMeggie。"

Hewatchedherwalkacrossthegraves，stepovertherailing；intherosebuddressherretreatingformwasgraceful，womanlyandalittleunreal。Ashesofroses。"Howappropriate，"hesaidtotheangel。CarswereroaringawayfromDroghedaashestrolledbackacrossthelawn；thepartywasfinallyover。Inside，thebandwaspackingawayitsinstruments，reelingwithrumandexhaustion，andthetiredmaidsandtemporaryhelpersweretryingtoclearup。FatherRalphshookhisheadatMrs。Smith。

"Sendeveryonetobed，mydear。It’saloteasiertodealwiththissortofthingwhenyou’refresh。I’llmakesureMrs。Carsonisn’tangry。""Wouldyoulikesomethingtoeat，Father？"

"GoodLord，no！I’mgoingtobed。"

Inthelateafternoonahandtouchedhisshoulder。Hereachedforitblindlywithouttheenergytoopenhiseyes，andtriedtoholditagainsthischeek。

"Meggie，"hemumbled。

"Father，Father！Oh，pleasewillyouwakeup？"AtthetoneofMrs。Smith’svoicehiseyescamesuddenlyveryawake。"Whatisit，Mrs。Smith？"

"It’sMrs。Carson，Father。She’sdead。"

Hiswatchtoldhimitwasaftersixintheevening；dazedandreelingfromtheheavytorportheday’sterribleheathadinducedinhim，hestruggledoutofhispajamasandintohispriest’sclothes，threwanarrowpurplestolearoundhisneckandtooktheoilofextremeunction，theholywater，hisbigsilvercross，hisebonyrosarybeads。ItneveroccurredtohimforamomenttowonderifMrs。Smithwasright；heknewthespiderwasdead。Hadshetakensomethingafterall？PrayGodifshehad，itwasneitherobviouslypresentintheroomnorobvioustoadoctor。Whatpossibleuseitwastoadministerextremeunctionhedidn’tknow。Butithadtobedone。Lethimrefuseandtherewouldbepost-mortems，allsortsofcomplications。Yetithadnothingtodowithhissuddensuspicionofsuicide；simplythattohimlayingsacredthingsonMaryCarson’sbodywasobscene。

Shewasverydead，musthavediedwithinminutesofretiring，agoodfifteenhoursearlier。Thewindowswereclosedfast，andtheroomhumidfromthegreatflatpansofwatersheinsistedbeputineveryinconspicuouscornertokeepherskinyouthful。Therewasapeculiarnoiseintheair；afterastupidmomentofwonderingherealizedwhatheheardwereflies，hordesoffliesbuzzing，insanelyclamoringastheyfeastedonher，matedonher，laidtheireggsonher。"ForGod’ssake，Mrs。Smith，openthewindows！"hegasped，movingtothebedside，facepallid。

Shehadpassedoutofrigormortisandwasagainlimp，disgustinglyso。Thestaringeyesweremottling，herthinlipsblack；andeverywhereonherweretheflies。HehadtohaveMrs。Smithkeepshooingthemawayasheworkedoverher，mutteringtheancientLatinexhortations。Whatafarce，andsheaccursed。Thesmellofher！Oh，God！Worsethananydeadhorseinthefreshnessofapaddock。Heshrankfromtouchingherindeathashehadinlife，especiallythoseflyblownlips。Shewouldbeamassofmaggotswithinhours。

Atlastitwasdone。Hestraightened。"GotoMr。Clearyatonce，Mrs。Smith，andforGod’ssaketellhimtogettheboysworkingonacoffinrightaway。NotimetohaveonesentoutfromGilly；she’srottingawaybeforeourveryeyes。Dearlord！Ifeelsick。I’mgoingtohaveabathandI’llleavemyclothesoutsidemydoor。Burnthem。I’llnevergetthesmellofheroutofthem。"

Backinhisroominridingbreechesandshirt-forhehadnotpackedtwosoutanes-herememberedtheletter，andhispromise。Seveno’clockhadstruck；hecouldheararestrainedchaosasmaidsandtemporaryhelpersflewtoclearthepartymessaway，transformthereceptionroombackintoachapel，readythehousefortomorrow’sfuneral。Nohelpforit，hewouldhavetogointoGillytonighttopickupanothersoutaneandvestmentsfortheRequiemMass。Certainthingshewasneverwithoutwhenheleftthepresbyteryforanout-lyingstation，carefullystrappedincompartmentsinthelittleblackcase，hissacramentsforbirth，death，benediction，worship，andthevestmentssuitableforMassatwhatevertimeoftheyearitwas。ButhewasanIrishman，andtocarrytheblackmourningaccoutermentsofaRequiemwastotemptfate。Paddy’svoiceechoedinthedistance，buthecouldnotfacePaddyatthemoment；heknewMrs。Smithwoulddowhathadtobedone。SittingathiswindowlookingoutoverthevistaofDroghedainthedyingsun，theghostgumsgolden，themassofredandpinkandwhiterosesinthegardenallempurpled，hetookMaryCarson’sletterfromhiscaseandhelditbetweenhishands。Butshehadinsistedhereaditbeforeheburiedher，andsomewhereinhismindalittlevoicewaswhisperingthathemustreaditnow，notlatertonightafterhehadseenPaddyandMeggie，butnowbeforehehadseenanyonesaveMaryCarson。

Itcontainedfoursheetsofpaper；heriffledthemapartandsawimmediatelythatthelowertwowereherwill。Thetoptwowereaddressedtohim，intheformofaletter。

MydearestRalph，

Youwillhaveseenthattheseconddocumentinthisenvelopeismywill。IalreadyhaveaperfectlygoodwillsignedandsealedinHarryGough’sofficeinGilly；thewillenclosedhereinisamuchlaterone，andnaturallynullifiestheoneHarryhas。

AsamatteroffactImadeitonlytheotherday，andhaditwitnessedbyTomandthefencer，sinceIunderstanditisnotpermissibletohaveanybeneficiarywitnessone’swill。Itisquitelegal，inspiteofthefactHarrydidn’tdrawitupforme。Nocourtinthelandwilldenyitsvalidity，Iassureyou。

Butwhydidn’tIhaveHarrydrawthistestamentupifIwantedtoalterthedispositionofmyeffects？Verysimple，mydearRalph。Iwantedabsolutelynoonetoknowofthiswill’sexistenceapartfromyou，andme。Thisistheonlycopy，andyouholdit。Notasoulknowsthatyoudo。Averyimportantpartofmyplan。

DoyourememberthatpieceoftheGospelwhereSatantookOurLordJesusChristupontoamountaintop，andtemptedHimwiththewholeworld？HowpleasantitistoknowIhavealittleofSatan’spower，andamabletotempttheoneIlove(doyoudoubtSatanlovedChrist？Idonot)withthewholeworld。Thecontemplationofyourdilemmahasconsiderablyenlivenedmythoughtsduringthepastfewyears，andthecloserIgettodying，themoredelightfulmyvisionsbecome。

Afteryou’vereadthewill，you’llunderstandwhatImean。WhileIbuminHellbeyondthebordersofthislifeIknownow，you’llstillbeinthatlife，butburninginahellwithfiercerflamesthananyGodcouldpossiblymanufacture。Oh，myRalph，I’vegaugedyoutoanicety！IfIneverknewhowtodoanythingelse，I’vealwaysknownhowtomaketheonesIlovesuffer。Andyou’refarbettergamethanmydeardepartedMichaeleverwas。WhenIfirstknewyou，youwantedDroghedaandmymoney，didn’tyou，Ralph？Yousawitasawaytobuybackyournaturalmétier。ButthencameMeggie，andyouputyouroriginalpurposeincultivatingmeoutofyourmind，didn’tyou？IbecameanexcusetovisitDroghedasoyoucouldbewithMeggie。IwondercouldyouhaveswitchedallegiancessoeasilyhadyouknownhowmuchI’mactuallyworth？Doyouknow，Ralph？Idon’tthinkyouhaveaninkling。Isupposeitisn’tladyliketomentiontheexactsumofone’sassetsinone’swill，soIhadbettertellyouherejusttomakesureyouhaveallthenecessaryinformationatyourfingertipswhenitcomestoyourmakingadecision。Giveortakeafewhundredthousands，myfortuneamountstosomethirteenmillionpounds。

I’mgettingdowntowardthefootofthesecondpage，andIcan’tbebotheredturningthisintoathesis。Readmywill，Ralph，andafteryou’vereadit，decidewhatyou’regoingtodowithit。WillyoutenderittoHarryGoughforprobate，orwillyouburnitandnevertellasoulitexisted。That’sthedecisionyou’vegottomake。IoughttoaddthatthewillinHarry’sofficeistheoneImadetheyearafterPaddycame，andleaveseverythingIhavetohim。Justsoyouknowwhathangsinthebalance。Ralph，Iloveyou，somuchIwouldhavekilledyoufornotwantingme，exceptthatthisisafarbetterformofreprisal。I’mnotthenoblekind；IloveyoubutIwantyoutoscreaminagony。Because，yousee，1knowwhatyourdecisionwillbe。IknowitassurelyasifIcouldbethere，watching。You’llscream，Ralph，you’llknowwhatagonyis。Soreadon，mybeautiful，ambitiouspriest！Readmywill，anddecideyourfate。

Itwasnotsignedorinitialed。Hefeltthesweatonhisforehead，feltitrunningdownthebackofhisneckfromhishair。Andhewantedtogetupthatverymomenttoburnbothdocuments，neverreadwhatthesecondonecontained。Butshehadgaugedherquarrywell，thegrossoldspider。Ofcoursehewouldreadon；hewastoocurioustoresist。God！Whathadheeverdone，tomakeherwanttodothistohim？Whydidwomenmakehimsufferso？Whycouldn’thehavebeenbornsmall，twisted，ugly？Ifhewereso，hemighthavebeenhappy。Thelasttwosheetswerecoveredbythesameprecise，almostminutewriting。Asmeanandgrudgingashersoul。

I，MaryElizabethCarson，beingofsoundmindandsoundbody，doherebydeclarethatthisismylastwillandtestament，therebyrenderingnullandvoidanysuchtestamentspreviouslymadebyme。Saveonlyforthespecialbequestsmadebelow，allmyworldlygoodsandmoneysandpropertiesIbequeathtotheHolyCatholicChurchofRome，undertheherebystatedconditionsofbequest:

First，thatthesaidHolyCatholicChurchofRome，tobecalledtheChurchhereafter，knowsinwhatesteemandwithwhataffectionIholdherpriest，FatherRalphdeBricassart。Itissolelybecauseofhiskindness，spiritualguidanceandunfailingsupportthatIsodisposeofmyassets。Secondly，thatthebequestshallcontinueinthefavoroftheChurchonlysolongassheappreciatestheworthandabilityofthesaidFatherRalphdeBricassart。

Thirdly，thatthesaidFatherRalphdeBricassartberesponsiblefortheadministrationandchannelingofthesemyworldlygoods，moneysandproperties，asthechiefauthorityinchargeofmyestate。Fourthly，thatuponthedemiseofthesaidFatherRalphdeBricassart，hisownlastwillandtestamentshallbelegallybindinginthematterofthefurtheradministrationofmyestate。Thatis，theChurchshallcontinueinfullownership，butFatherRalphdeBricassartshallbesolelyresponsibleforthenamingofhissuccessorinadministration；heshallnotbeobligedtoselectasuccessorwhoiseitheranecclesiasticaloralaymemberoftheChurch。

Fifthly，thatthestationDroghedabeneversoldnorsubdivided。Sixthly，thatmybrother，PadraicCleary，beretainedasmanagerofthestationDroghedawiththerighttodwellinmyhouse，andthathebepaidasalaryatthediscretionofFatherRalphdeBricassartandnoother。Seventhly，thatintheeventofthedeathofmybrother，thesaidPadraicCleary，hiswidowandchildrenbepermittedtoremainonthestationDroghedaandthatthepositionofmanagershallpassconsecutivelytoeachofhissons，Robert，John，Hugh，Stuart，JamesandPatrick，butexcludingFrancis。Eighthly，thatuponthedemiseofPatrickorwhicheversonexcludingFrancisisthelastsonremaining，thesamerightsbepermittedthesaidPadraicCleary’sgrandchildren。

Specialbequests:

ToPadraicCleary，thecontentsofmyhousesonthestationDrogheda。ToEuniceSmith，myhousekeeper，thatsheremainatafairsalarysolongasshedesires，andinadditionthatshebepaidthesumoffivethousandpoundsforthwith，andthatuponherretirementshebeawardedanequitablepension。

ToMinervaO’BrienandCatherineDonnelly，thattheyremainatfairsalariessolongastheydesire，andinadditionthattheybepaidthesumofonethousandpoundseachforthwith，andthatupontheirretirementstheybeawardedequitablepensions。

ToFatherRalphdeBricassartthesumoftenthousandpoundstobepaidannuallysolongasheshalllive，forhisownprivateandunquestioneduse。

Itwasdulysigned，datedandwitnessed。

Hisroomlookedwest。Thesunwassetting。Thepallofdustwhichcamewitheverysummerfilledthesilentair，andthesunthrustitsfingersthroughthefinestrungparticlessothatitseemedthewholeworldhadturnedtogoldandpurple。Streakycloudsrimmedinbrilliantfirepokedsilverstreamersacrossthegreatbloodyballwhichhungjustabovethetreesofthefarpaddocks。

"Bravo！"hesaid。"Iadmit，Mary，you’vebeatenme。Amasterstroke。Iwasthefool，notyou。"

Hecouldnotseethepagesinhishandthroughthetears，andmovedthembeforetheycouldbeblotched。Thirteenmillionpounds。Thirteenmillionpounds！ItwasindeedwhathehadbeenanglingforinthedaysbeforeMeggie。Andwithhercominghehadabandonedit，becausehecouldn’tcarryonsuchacampaignincoldbloodtocheatherofherinheritance。Butwhatifhehadknownhowmuchtheoldspiderwasworth？Whatthen？Hehadnoideaitwasatenthsomuch。Thirteenmillionpounds！

ForsevenyearsPaddyandhisfamilyhadlivedintheheadstockman’shouseandworkedthemselvesraggedforMaryCarson。Forwhat？Theniggardlywagesshepaid？NevertoFatherRalph’sknowledgehadPaddycomplainedofbeingshabbilytreated，thinkingnodoubtthatwhenhissisterdiedhewouldbeamplyrepaidformanagingthepropertyonordinarystockman’spay，whilehissonsdidstockman’sworkforrouseabout’swages。Hehadmadedo，andgrowntoloveDroghedaasifitwerehisown，rightlyassumingitwouldbe。"Bravo，Mary！"saidFatherRalphagain，thesefirsttearssincehisboyhooddroppingfromhisfaceontothebacksofhishands，butnotontothepaper。Thirteenmillionpounds，andthechancetobeCardinaldeBricassartyet。AgainstPaddyCleary，hiswife，hissonsandMeggie。Howdiabolicallywellshehadreadhim！HadshestrippedPaddyofeverything，hiswaywouldhavebeenclear:hecouldhavetakenthewilldowntothekitchenstoveandthrustitinsidethefireboxwithoutaqualm。ButshehadmadesurePaddywouldn’twant，thatafterherdeathhewouldbemorecomfortableonDroghedathanduringherlife，andthatDroghedacouldnotquitebetakenfromhim。Itsprofitsandtitle，yes，butnotthelanditself。No，hewouldn’tbetheownerofthatfabulousthirteenmillionpounds，buthewouldbewellrespected，comfortablyprovidedfor。Meggiewouldn’tgohungry，orbethrownshoelessupontheworld。NorwouldshebeMissCleary，either，abletostandonanequalfootingwithMissCarmichaelandthatilk。Quiterespectable，sociallyadmissible，butnottopdrawer。Nevertopdrawer。

Thirteenmillionpounds。ThechancetogetoutofGillanboneandperpetualobscurity，thechancetotakehisplacewithinthehierarchyofChurchadministration，theassuredgoodwillofhispeersandsuperiors。Andallwhilehewasstillyoungenoughtomakeupthegroundhehadlost。MaryCarsonhadmadeGillanbonetheepicenteroftheArchbishopPapalLegate’smapwithavengeance；thetremorswouldreachasfarastheVatican。RichthoughtheChurchwas，thirteenmillionpoundswasthirteenmillionpounds。Nottobesneezedat，evenbytheChurch。Andhiswasthesolehandwhichbroughtitintothefold，hishandacknowledgedinblueinkinMaryCarson’sownwriting。HeknewPaddywouldnevercontestthewill；sohadMaryCarson，Godrother。Oh，certainlyPaddywouldbefurious，wouldneverwanttoseehimagainorspeaktohimagain，buthischagrinwouldn’textendtolitigation。Wasthereadecision？Didn’thealreadyknow，hadn’theknownthemomenthereadherwillwhathewasgoingtodo？Thetearshaddried。WithhisusualgraceFatherRalphgottohisfeet，madesurehisshirtwastuckedinallthewayround，andwenttothedoor。HemustgettoGilly，pickupasoutaneandvestments。ButfirsthewantedtoseeMaryCarsonagain。Inspiteoftheopenwindowsthestenchhadbecomeareekingfug；nohintofabreezestirredthelimpcurtains。Withsteadytreadhecrossedtothebedandstoodlookingdown。Theflyeggswerebeginningtohatchmaggotsinallthewetpartsofherface，ballooninggasespuffedupherfatarmsandhandstogreenishblobs，herskinwasbreakingdown。Oh，God。Youdisgustingoldspider。You’vewon，butwhatavictory。Thetriumphofonedisintegratingcaricatureofhumanityoveranother。Youcan’tdefeatmyMeggie，norcanyoutakefromherwhatwasneveryours。ImightburninHellalongsideyou，butIknowtheHellthey’vegotplannedforyou:toseemyindifferencetoyoupersistaswerotawaytogetherthroughalleternity……

Paddywaswaitingforhiminthehalldownstairs，lookingsickandbewildered。

"Oh，Father！"hesaid，comingforward。"Isn’tthisawful？Whatashock！Ineverexpectedhertogooutlikethis；shewassowelllastnight！DearGod，whatamIgoingtodo？"

"Haveyouseenher？"

"Heavenhelpme，yes！"

"Thenyouknowwhathastobedone。I’veneverseenacorpsedecomposesofast。Ifyoudon’tgetherdecentlyintosomesortofcontainerwithinthenextfewhoursyou’llhavetopourherintoapetroldrum。She’llhavetobeburiedfirstthinginthemorning。Don’twastetimebeautifyinghercoffin；coveritwithrosesfromthegardenorsomething。Butgetamoveon，man！I’mgoingintoGillyforvestments。"

"Getbackassoonasyoucan，Father！"Paddypleaded。ButFatherRalphwasratherlongerthanasimplevisittothepresbyterydemanded。BeforeheturnedhiscarinthatdirectionhedrovedownoneofGillanbone’smoreprosperoussidestreets，toafairlypretentiousdwellingsurroundedbyawell-laid-outgarden。

HarryGoughwasjustsittingdowntohisdinner，butcameintotheparlorwhenthemaidtoldhimwhohadcalled。

"Father，willyoueatwithus？Cornedbeefandcabbagewithboiledpotatoesandparsleysauce，andforoncethebeef’snottoosalty。"

"No，Harry，Ican’tstay。IjustcametotellyouMaryCarsondiedthismorning。"

"HolyJesus！Iwastherelastnight！Sheseemedsowell，Father！""Iknow。ShewasperfectlywellwhenItookherupthestairsaboutthree，butshemusthavediedalmostthemomentsheretired。Mrs。Smithfoundheratsixthisevening。Bythenshe’dbeendeadsolongshewashideous；theroomwasshutuplikeanincubatorallthroughtheheatoftheday。DearLord，Ipraytoforgetthesightofher！Unspeakable，Harry，awful。"

"She’llbeburiedtomorrow？"

"She’llhavetobe。"

"Whattimeisit？Ten？WemusteatdinneraslateastheSpaniardsinthisheat，butnoneedtoworry，it’stoolatetostartphoningpeople。Wouldyoulikemetodothatforyou，Father？"

"Thankyou，itwouldbeagreatkindness。IonlycameintoGillyforvestments。IneverexpectedtobesayingaRequiemwhenIstartedout。ImustgetbacktoDroghedaasquicklyasIcan；theyneedme。TheMasswillbeatnineinthemorning。"

"TellPaddyI’llbringherwillwithme，soIcandealwithitstraightafterthefuneral。You’reabeneficiary，too，Father，soI’dappreciateyourstayingforthereading。"

"I’mafraidwehaveaslightproblem，Harry。Marymadeanotherwill，yousee。Lastnightaftersheleftthepartyshegavemeasealedenvelope，andmademepromiseI’dopenitthemomentIsawherdeadbodyformyself。WhenIdidsoIfounditcontainedafreshwill。"

"Marymadeanewwill？Withoutme？"

"Itwouldappearso。Ithinkitwassomethingshehadbeenmullingforalongtime，butastowhyshechosetobesosecretiveaboutit，Idon’tknow。"

"Doyouhaveitwithyounow，Father？"

"Yes。"Thepriestreachedinsidehisshirtandhandedoverthesheetsofpaper，foldedsmall。

Thelawyerhadnocompunctionaboutreadingthemonthespot。Whenhefinishedhelookedup，andtherewasagreatdealinhiseyesFatherRalphwouldrathernothaveseen。Admiration，anger，acertaincontempt。"Well，Father，congratulations！Yougotthelotafterall。"Hecouldsayit，notbeingaCatholic。

"Believeme，Harry，itcameasabiggersurprisetomethanitdoestoyou。"

"Thisistheonlycopy？"

"AsfarasIknow，yes。"

"Andshegaveittoyouaslateaslastnight？""Yes。"

"Thenwhydidn’tyoudestroyit，makesurepooroldPaddygotwhat’srightfullyhis？TheChurchhasnorighttoMaryCarson’spossessionsatall。"Thepriest’sfineeyeswerebland。"Ah，butthatwouldn’thavebeenfitting，Harry，woulditnow？ItwasMary’sproperty，todisposeofinanymannershewished。"

"IshalladvisePaddytocontest。"

"Ithinkyoushould。"

Andonthatnotetheyparted。BythetimeeveryonearrivedinthemorningtoseeMaryCarsonburied，thewholeofGillanboneandallpointsofthecompassarounditwouldknowwherethemoneywasgoing。Thediewascast，therecouldbenoturningback。

ItwasfourinthemorningwhenFatherRalphgotthroughthelastgateandintotheHomePaddock，forhehadn’thurriedonthereturndrive。Allthroughithehadwilledhismindtoblankness；hewouldn’tlethimselfthink。NotofPaddyorofFee，or。Meggieorthatstinkinggrossthingtheyhad(hedevoutlyhoped)pouredintohercoffin。Insteadheopenedhiseyesandhismindtothenight，totheghostlysilverofdeadtreesstandinglonelyinthegleaminggrass，totheheart-of-darknessshadowscastbystandsoftimber，tothefullmoonridingtheheavenslikeanairybubble。Oncehestoppedthecarandgotout，walkedtoawirefenceandleanedonitstautnesswhilehebreathedinthegumsandthebewitchingaromaofwildflowers。Thelandwassobeautiful，sopure，soindifferenttothefatesofthecreatureswhopresumedtoruleit。Theymightputtheirhandstoit，butinthelongrunitruledthem。Untiltheycoulddirecttheweatherandsummonuptherain，ithadtheupperhand。Heparkedhiscarsomedistancebehindthehouseandwalkedslowlytowardit。Everywindowwasfulloflight；faintlyfromthehousekeeper’squartershecouldhearthesoundofMrs。SmithleadingthetwoIrishmaidsinarosary。Ashadowmovedundertheblacknessofthewistariavine；hestoppedshort，hishacklesrising。Shehadgottohiminmorewaysthanone，theoldspider。ButitwasonlyMeggie，patientlywaitingforhimtocomeback。Shewasinjodhpursandboots，verymuchalive。

"Yougavemeafright，"hesaidabruptly。

"I’msorry，Father，Ididn’tmeanto。ButIdidn’twanttobeinsidetherewithDaddyandtheboys，andMumisstilldownatourhousewiththebabies。IsupposeIoughttobeprayingwithMrs。SmithandMinnieandCat，butIdon’tfeellikeprayingforher。That’sasin，isn’tit？"HewasinnomoodtopandertothememoryofMaryCarson。"Idon’tthinkit’sasin，Meggie，whereashypocrisyis。Idon’tfeellikeprayingforher，either。Shewasn’t……averygoodperson。"Hissmileflashed。"Soifyou’vesinnedinsayingit，sohaveI，andmoreseriouslyatthat。I’msupposedtoloveeveryone，aburdenwhichisn’tlaiduponyou。""Areyouallright，Father？"

"Yes，I’mallright。"Helookedupatthehouse，andsighed。"Idon’twanttobeinthere，that’sall。Idon’twanttobewheresheisuntilit’slightandthedemons200，ofthedarknessaredrivenaway。IfIsaddlethehorses，willyouridewithmeuntildawn？"

Herhandtouchedhisblacksleeve，fell。"Idon’twanttogoinside，either。"

"WaitaminutewhileIputmysoutaneinthecar。"

"I’llgoontothestables。"

Forthefirsttimeshewastryingtomeethimonhisground，adultground；hecouldsensethedifferenceinherassurelyashecouldsmelltherosesinMaryCarson’sbeautifulgardens。Roses。Ashesofroses。Roses，roses，everywhere。Petalsinthegrass。Rosesofsummer，redandwhiteandyellow。Perfumeofroses，heavyandsweetinthenight。Pinkroses，bleachedbythemoontoashes。Ashesofroses，ashesofroses。MyMeggie，Ihaveforsakenyou。Butcan’tyousee，you’vebecomeathreat？ThereforehaveIcrushedyoubeneaththeheelofmyambition；youhavenomoresubstancetomethanabruisedroseinthegrass。Thesmellofroses。ThesmellofMaryCarson。Rosesandashes，ashesofroses。

"Ashesofroses，"hesaid，mounting。"Let’sgetasfarfromthesmellofrosesasthemoon。Tomorrowthehousewillbefullofthem。"

HekickedthechestnutmareandcanteredaheadofMeggiedownthetracktothecreek，longingtoweep；foruntilhesmelledthefutureadornmentsofMaryCarson’scoffinithadnotactuallyimpingedonhisthinkingbrainasanimminentfact。Hewouldbegoingawayverysoon。Toomanythoughts，toomanyemotions，allofthemungovernable。Theywouldn’tleavehiminGillyadayafterlearningthetermsofthatincrediblewill；theywouldrecallhimtoSydneyimmediately。Immediately！Hefledfromhispain，neverhavingknownsuchpain，butitkeptpacewithhimeffortlessly。Itwasn’tsomethinginavaguesometime；itwasgoingtohappenimmediately。AndhecouldalmostseePaddy’sface，therevulsion，theturningaway。Afterthishewouldn’tbewelcomeonDrogheda，andhewouldneverseeMeggieagain。

Thediscipliningbeganthen，hammeredbyhoofsandinasensationofflying。Itwasbetterso，betterso，betterso。Gallopingonandon。Yes，itwouldsurelyhurtlessthen，tuckedsafelyinsomecellinabishop’spalace，hurtlessandless，untilfinallyeventheachefadedfromconsciousness。Ithadtobebetterso。BetterthanstayinginGillytowatchherchangeintoacreaturehedidn’twant，thenhavetomarryheronedaytosomeunknownman。Outofsight，outofmind。

Thenwhatwashedoingwithhernow，ridingthroughthestandofboxandcoolibahonthefarsideofthecreek？Hecouldn’tseemtothinkwhy，heonlyfeltthepain。Notthepainofbetrayal；therewasn’troomforthat。Onlyforthepainofleavingher。

"Father，Father！Ican’tkeepupwithyou！Slowdown，Father，please！"Itwasthecalltoduty，andreality。Likeamaninslowmotionhewrenchedthemarearound，satituntilithaddancedoutitsexcitement。AndwaitedforMeggietocatchhimup。Thatwasthetrouble。Meggiewascatchinghimup。Closebythemwastheroaroftheborehead，agreatsteamingpoolsmellingofsulphur，withapipelikeaship’sventilatorjettingboilingwaterintoitsdepths。Allaroundtheperimeterofthelittleelevatedlakelikespokesfromawheel’shub，theboredrainsdribbledoffacrosstheplainwhiskeredinincongruouslyemeraldgrass。Thebanksofthepoolwereslimygreymud，andthefreshwatercrayfishcalledyabbieslivedinthemud。FatherRalphstartedtolaugh。"ItsmellslikeHell，Meggie，doesn’tit？Sulphurandbrimstone，righthereonherownproperty，inherownbackyard。Sheoughttorecognizethesmellwhenshegetstheredeckedinroses，oughtn’tshe？Oh，Meggie……"

Thehorsesweretrainedtostandonadanglingrein；therewerenofencesnearby，andnotreescloserthanhalfamileaway。Buttherewasalogonthesideofthepoolfarthestfromtheboreheaditself，wherethewaterwascooler。Itwastheseatprovidedforwinterbathersastheydriedtheirfeetandlegs。FatherRalphsatdownandMeggiesatsomewayfromhim，turnedsideontowatchhim。

"What’sthematter，Father？"

Itsoundedpeculiar，hisoft-askedquestionfromherlips，tohim。Hesmiled。"I’vesoldyou，myMeggie，soldyouforthirteenmillionpiecesofsilver。"

"Soldme？"

"Afigureofspeech。Itdoesn’tmatter。Come，sitclosertome。Theremaynotbethechanceforustotalktogetheragain。"

"Whilewe’reinmourningforAuntie，youmean？"Shewriggledupthelogandsatnexttohim。"Whatdifferencewillbeinginmourningmake？""Idon’tmeanthat，Meggie。"

"YoumeanbecauseI’mgrowingup，andpeoplemightgossipaboutus？""Notexactly。ImeanI’mgoingaway。"

Thereitwas:themeetingoftroubleheadon，theacceptanceofanotherload。Nooutcry，noweeping，nostormofprotest。Justatinyshrinking，asiftheburdensataskew，wouldnotdistributeitselfsoshecouldbearitproperly。Andacaughtbreath，notquitelikeasigh。"When？"

"Amatterofdays。"

"Oh，Father！ItwillbeharderthanFrank。"

"Andformeharderthananythinginmylife。Ihavenoconsolation。Youatleasthaveyourfamily。"

"YouhaveyourGod。"

"Wellsaid，Meggie！Youaregrowingup！"

But，tenaciousfemale，hermindhadreturnedtothequestionshehadriddenthreemileswithoutachancetoask。Hewasleaving，itwouldbesohardtodowithouthim，butthequestionhaditsownimportance。

"Father，inthestablesyousaid"ashesofroses。"Didyoumeanthecolorofmydress？"

"Inaway，perhaps。ButIthinkreallyImeantsomethingelse。""What？"

"Nothingyou’dunderstand，myMeggie。Thedyingofanideawhichhadnorighttobeborn，letalonenurtured。"

"Thereisnothingwhichhasnorighttobeborn，evenanidea。"Heturnedhisheadtowatchher。"YouknowwhatI’mtalkingabout，don’tyou？"

"Ithinkso。"

"Noteverythingbornisgood，Meggie。"

"No。Butifitwasbornatall，itwasmeanttobe。"

"YouarguelikeaJesuit。Howoldareyou？"

"I’llbeseventeeninamonth，Father。"

"Andyou’vetoiledallseventeenyearsofit。Well，hardworkagesusaheadofouryears。Whatdoyouthinkabout，Meggie，whenyou’vethetimetothink？"

"Oh，aboutJimsandPatsyandtherestoftheboys，aboutDaddyandMum，aboutHalandAuntieMary。Sometimesaboutgrowingbabies。I’dlikethatverymuch。Andriding，thesheep。Allthethingsthementalkabout。Theweather，therain，thevegetablegarden，thehens，whatI’mgoingtodotomorrow。""Doyoudreamofhavingahusband？"

"No，exceptIsupposeI’llhavetohaveoneifIwanttogrowbabies。Itisn’tniceforababytohavenofather。"

Inspiteofhispainhesmiled；shewassuchaquaintmixtureofignoranceandmorality。Thenheswungsideways，tookherchininhishandandstareddownather。Howtodoit，whathadtobedone？"Meggie，IrealizedsomethingnotlongagowhichIoughttohaveseensooner。Youweren’tbeingquitetruthfulwhenyoutoldmewhatyouthoughtabout，wereyou？"

"I……"shesaid，andfellsilent。

"Youdidn’tsayyouthoughtaboutme，didyou？Iftherewasnoguiltinit，youwouldhavementionedmynamealongsideyourfather’s。Ithinkperhapsit’sagoodthingI’mgoingaway，don’tyou？You’realittleoldtobehavingschoolgirlcrushes，butyou’renotaveryoldalmost-seventeen，areyou？Ilikeyourlackofworldlywisdom，butIknowhowpainfulschoolgirlcrushescanbe；I’vesufferedenoughofthem。"

Sheseemedabouttospeak，butintheendherlidsfellovertear-brighteyes，sheshookherheadfree。

"Look，Meggie，it’ssimplyaphase，amarkerontheroadtobeingawoman。Whenyou’vebecomethatwoman，you’llmeetthemandestinedtobeyourhusbandandyou’llbefartoobusygettingonwithyourlifetothinkofme，exceptasanoldfriendwhohelpedyouthroughsomeoftheterriblespasmsofgrowingup。Whatyoumustn’tdoisgetintothehabitofdreamingaboutmeinanysortofromanticfashion。Icanneverregardyouthewayahusbandwill。Idon’tthinkofyouinthatlightatall，Meggie，——doyouunderstandme？WhenIsayIloveyou，Idon’tmeanIloveyouasaman。Iamapriest，notaman。Sodon’tfillyourheadwithdreamsofme。I’mgoingaway，andIdoubtverymuchthatI’llhavetimetocomeback，evenonavisit。"

Hershoulderswerebentasiftheloadwasveryheavy，butsheliftedherheadtolookdirectlyintohisface。

"Iwon’tfillmyheadwithdreamsofyou，don’tworry。Iknowyou’reapriest。"

"I’mnotconvincedIchosemyvocationwrongly。Itfillsaneedinmenohumanbeingevercould，evenyou。"

"Iknow。IcanseeitwhenyousayMass。Youhaveapower。IsupposeyoumustfeellikeOurLord。"

"Icanfeeleverysuspendedbreathinthechurch，Meggie！AseachdaygoesonIdie，andineachmorningsayingMassIamreborn。ButisitbecauseI’m

God’schosenpriest，orbecauseIhearthoseawedbreaths，knowthepowerIhaveovereverysoulpresent？"

"Doesitmatter？Itjustis。"

"Itwouldprobablynevermattertoyou，butitdoestome。Idoubt，Idoubt。"

Sheswitchedthesubjecttowhatmatteredtoher。"Idon’tknowhowIshallgetonwithoutyou，Father。FirstFrank，nowyou。SomehowwithHalit’sdifferent；Iknowhe’sdeadandcannevercomeback。ButyouandFrankarealive！I’llalwaysbewonderinghowyouare，whatyou’redoing，ifyou’reallright，ifthere’sanythingIcoulddotohelpyou。I’llevenhavetowonderifyou’restillalive，won’tI？"

"I’llbefeelingthesame，Meggie，andI’msurethatFrankdoes，too。""No。Frank’sforgottenus……Youwill，too。"

"Icouldneverforgetyou，Meggie，notaslongasIlive。AndformypunishmentI’mgoingtolivealong，longtime。"Hegotupandpulledhertoherfeet，puthisarmsaboutherlooselyandaffectionately。"Ithinkthisisgoodbye，Meggie。Wecan’tbealoneagain。"

"Ifyouhadn’tbeenapriest，Father，wouldyouhavemarriedme？"Thetitlejarred。"Don’tcallmethatallthetime！MynameisRalph。"Whichdidn’tanswerherquestion。

Thoughheheldher，hedidnothaveanyintentionofkissingher。Thefaceraisedtohiswasnearlyinvisible，forthemoonhadsetanditwasverydark。Hecouldfeelhersmall，pointedbreastslowdownonhischest；acurioussensation，disturbing。Evenmoresowasthefactthatasnaturallyasifshecameintoaman’sarmseverydayofherlife，herarmshadgoneuparoundhisneck，andlinkedtightly。

Hehadneverkissedanyoneasalover，didnotwanttonow；nor，hethought，didMeggie。Awarmsaluteonthecheek，aquickhug，asshewoulddemandofherfatherwerehetogoaway。Shewassensitiveandproud；hemusthavehurtherdeeplywhenheheldupherpreciousdreamstodispassionateinspection。Undoubtedlyshewasaseagertobedonewiththefarewellashewas。Woulditcomforthertoknowhispainwasfarworsethanhers？Ashebenthisheadtocomeathercheeksheraisedherselfontiptoe，andmorebyluckthangoodmanagementtouchedhislipswithherown。Hejerkedbackasifhetastedthespider’spoison，thenhetippedhisheadforwardbeforehecouldloseher，triedtosaysomethingagainstthesweetshutmouth，andintryingtoanswershepartedit。Herbodyseemedtoloseallitsbones，becomefluid，awarmmeltingdarkness；oneofhisarmswasclampedroundherwaist，theotheracrossherbackwithitshandonherskull，inherhair，holdingherfaceuptohisasiffrightenedshewouldgofromhiminthatverymoment，beforehecouldgraspandcataloguethisunbelievablepresencewhowasMeggie。Meggie，andnotMeggie，tooalientobefamiliar，forhisMeggiewasn’tawoman，didn’tfeellikeawoman，couldneverbeawomantohim。Justashecouldn’tbeamantoher。Thethoughtovercamehisdrowningsenses；hewrenchedherarmsfromabouthisneck，thrustherawayandtriedtoseeherfaceinthedarkness。Butherheadwasdown，shewouldn’tlookathim。

"It’stimeweweregoing，Meggie，"hesaid。

Withoutawordsheturnedtoherhorse，mountedandwaitedforhim；usuallyitwashewhowaitedforher。

FatherRalphhadbeenright。AtthistimeofyearDroghedawasawashwithroses，sothehousewassmotheredinthem。Byeightthatmorninghardlyonebloomwasleftinthegarden。Thefirstofthemournersbegantoarrivenotlongafterthefinalrosewasplunderedfromitsbush；alightbreakfastofcoffeeandfreshlybaked，butteredrollswaslaidoutinthesmalldiningroom。AfterMaryCarsonwasdepositedinthevaultamoresubstantialrepastwouldbeservedinthebigdiningroom，tofortifythedepartingmournersontheirlongwayshome。Thewordhadgotaround；noneedtodoubttheefficiencyoftheGillygrapevine，whichwasthepartyline。Whilelipsshapedconventionalphrases，eyesandthemindsbehindthemspeculated，deduced，smiledslyly。

"Ihearwe’regoingtoloseyou，Father，"saidMissCarmichaelnastily。Hehadneverlookedsoremote，sodevoidofhumanfeelingashedidthatmorninginhislacelessalbanddullblackchasublewithsilvercross。Itwasasifheattendedonlyinbody，whilehisspiritmovedfaraway。ButhelookeddownatMissCarmichaelabsently，seemedtorecollecthimself，andsmiledwithgenuinemirth。

"Godmovesinstrangeways，MissCarmichael，"hesaid，andwenttospeaktosomeoneelse。

Whatwasonhismindnoonecouldhaveguessed；itwasthecomingconfrontationwithPaddyoverthewill，andhisdreadofseeingPaddy’srage，hisneedofPaddy’srageandcontempt。

BeforehebegantheRequiemMassheturnedtofacehiscongregation；theroomwasjammed，andreekedsoofrosesthatopenwindowscouldnotdissipatetheirheavyperfume。

"Idonotintendtomakealongeulogy，"hesaidinhisclear，almostOxforddictionwithitsfaintIrishunderlay。"MaryCarsonwasknowntoyouall。Apillarofthecommunity，apillaroftheChurchshelovedmorethananylivingbeing。"

Atthatpointtherewerethosewhosworehiseyesmocked，butotherswhomaintainedjustasstoutlythattheyweredulledwitharealandabidinggrief。

"ApillaroftheChurchshelovedmorethananylivingbeing，"herepeatedmoreclearlystill；hewasnotonetoturnaway，either。"Inherlasthourshewasalone，yetshewasnotalone。ForinthehourofourdeathOurLordJesusChristiswithus，withinus，bearingtheburdenofouragony。Notthegreatestnorthehumblestlivingbeingdiesalone，anddeathissweet。Wearegatheredheretoprayforherimmortalsoul，thatshewhomwelovedinlifeshallenjoyherjustandeternalreward。Letuspray。"Themakeshiftcoffinwassocoveredinrosesitcouldnotbeseen，anditresteduponasmallwheeledcarttheboyshadcannibalizedfromvariouspiecesoffarmequipment。Evenso，withthewindowsgapingopenandtheoverpoweringscentofroses，theycouldsmellher。Thedoctorhadbeentalking，too。

"WhenIreachedDroghedashewassorottenthatIjustcouldn’tholdmystomach，"hesaidonthepartylinetoMartinKing。"I’veneverfeltsosorryforanyoneinallmylifeasIdidthenforPaddyCleary，notonlybecausehe’sbeendoneoutofDroghedabutbecausehehadtoshovethatawfulseethingheapinacoffin。"

"ThenI’mnotvolunteeringfortheofficeofpallbearer，"Martinsaid，sofaintlybecauseofallthereceiversdownthatthedoctorhadtomakehimrepeatthestatementthreetimesbeforeheunderstoodit。Hencethecart；noonewaswillingtoshouldertheremainsofMaryCarsonacrossthelawntothevault。Andnoonewassorrywhenthevaultdoorswereclosedonherandbreathingcouldbecomenormalatlast。Whilethemournersclusteredinthebigdiningroomeating，ortryingtolookasiftheywereeating，HarryGoughconductedPaddy，hisfamily，FatherRalph，Mrs。Smithandthetwomaidstothedrawingroom。Noneofthemournershadanyintentionofgoinghomeyet，hencethepretenseateating；theywantedtobeonhandtoseewhatPaddylookedlikewhenhecameoutafterthereadingofthewill。Todohimandhisfamilyjustice，theyhadn’tcomportedthemselvesduringthefuneralasifconsciousoftheirelevatedstatus。Asgoodheartedasever，Paddyhadweptforhissister，andFeelookedexactlyasshealwaysdid，asifshedidn’tcarewhathappenedtoher。

"Paddy，Iwantyoutocontest，"HarryGoughsaidafterhehadreadtheamazingdocumentthroughinahard，indignantvoice。"Thewickedoldbitch！"saidMrs。Smith；thoughshelikedthepriest，shewasfonderbyfaroftheClearys。Theyhadbroughtbabiesandchildrenintoherlife。

ButPaddyshookhishead。"No，Harry！Icouldn’tdothat。Thepropertywashers，wasn’tit？Shewasquiteentitledtodowhatshelikedwithit。IfshewantedtheChurchtohaveit，shewantedtheChurchtohaveit。Idon’tdenyit’sabitofadisappointment，butI’mjustanordinarysortofchap，soperhapsit’sforthebest。Idon’tthinkI’dliketheresponsibilityofowningapropertythesizeofDrogheda。"

"Youdon’tunderstand，Paddy！"thelawyersaidinaslow，distinctvoice，asifhewereexplainingtoachild。"Itisn’tjustDroghedaI’mtalkingabout。Droghedawastheleastpartofwhatyoursisterhadtoleave，believeme。She’samajorshareholderinahundredgilt-edgedcompanies，sheownssteelfactoriesandgoldmines，she’sMicharLimited，withaten-storyofficebuildingalltoherselfinSydney。ShewasworthmorethananyoneinthewholeofAustralia！Funny，shemademecontacttheSydneydirectorsofMicharLimitednotfourweeksago，tofindouttheexactextentofherassets。Whenshediedshewasworthsomethingoverthirteenmillionpounds。""Thirteenmillionpounds！"Paddysaiditasonesaysthedistancefromtheearthtothesun，somethingtotallyincomprehensible。"Thatsettlesit，Harry。Idon’twanttheresponsibilityofthatkindofmoney。""It’snoresponsibility，Paddy！Don’tyouunderstandyet？Moneylikethatlooksafteritself！You’dhavenothingtodowithcultivatingorharvestingit；therearehundredsofpeopleemployedsimplytotakecareofitforyou。Contestthewill，Paddy，please！I’llgetyouthebestKC’SinthecountryandI’llfightitforyouallthewaytothePrivyCouncilifnecessary。"

Suddenlyrealizingthathisfamilywereasconcernedashimself，PaddyturnedtoBobandJack，sittingtogetherbewilderedonaFlorentinemarblebench。"Boys，whatdoyousay？DoyouwanttogoafterAuntieMary’sthirteenmillionquid？IfyoudoI’llcontest，nototherwise。"

"ButwecanliveonDroghedaanyway，isn’tthatwhatthewillsays？"Bobasked。

Harryanswered。"NoonecanturnyouoffDroghedasolongasevenoneofyourfather’sgrandchildrenlives。"

"We’regoingtolivehereinthebighouse，haveMrs。Smithandthegirlstolookafterus，andearnadecentwage，"saidPaddyasifhecouldhardlybelievehisgoodfortuneratherthanhisbad。

"Thenwhatmoredowewant，Jack？"Bobaskedhisbrother。"Don’tyouagree？"

"Itsuitsme，"saidJack。

FatherRalphmovedrestlessly。HehadnotstoppedtoshedhisRequiemvestments，norhadhetakenachair；likeadarkandbeautifulsorcererhestoodhalfintheshadowsatthebackoftheroom，isolated，hishandshiddenbeneaththeblackchasuble，hisfacestill，andatthebackofthedistantblueeyesahorrified，stunnedresentment。Therewasnotevengoingtobethelonged-forchastisementofrageorcontempt；Paddywasgoingtohanditalltohimonagoldenplateofgoodwill，andthankhimforrelievingtheClearysofaburden。

"WhataboutFeeandMeggie？"thepriestaskedPaddyharshly。"Doyounotthinkenoughofyourwomentoconsultthem，too？""Fee？"askedPaddyanxiously。

"Whateveryoudecide，Paddy。Idon’tcare。"

"Meggie？"

"Idon’twantherthirteenmillionpiecesofsilver，"Meggiesaid，hereyesfixedonFatherRalph。

Paddyturnedtothelawyer。"Thenthat’sit，Harry。Wedon’twanttocontestthewill。LettheChurchhaveMary’smoney，andwelcome。"Harrystruckhishandstogether。"Goddamnit，Ihatetoseeyoucheated！""IthankmystarsforMary，"saidPaddygently。"Ifitwasn’tforherI’dstillbetryingtoscrapealivinginNewZealand。"

AstheycameoutofthedrawingroomPaddystoppedFatherRalphandheldouthishand，infullviewofthefascinatedmournersclusteringinthediningroomdoorway。

"Father，pleasedon’tthinkthereareanyhardfeelingsonourside。Marywasneverswayedbyanotherhumanbeinginallherlife，priestorbrotherorhusband。Youtakeitfromme，shedidwhatshewantedtodo。Youweremightygoodtoher，andyou’vebeenmightygoodtous。We’llneverforgetit。"Theguilt。Theburden。AlmostFatherRalphdidnotmovetotakethatgnarledstainedhand，butthecardinal’sbrainwon；hegrippeditfeverishlyandsmiled，agonized。

"Thankyou，Paddy。YoumayrestassuredI’llseeyouneverwantforathing。"

Withintheweekhewasgone，nothavingappearedonDroghedaagain。Hespentthefewdayspackinghisscantbelongings，andtouringeverystationinthedistrictwheretherewereCatholicfamilies；saveDrogheda。FatherWatkinThomas，lateofWales，arrivedtoassumethedutiesofparishpriesttotheGillanbonedistrict，whileFatherRalphdeBricassartbecameprivatesecretarytoArchbishopClunyDark。Buthisworkloadwaslight；hehadtwoundersecretaries。ForthemostparthewasoccupiedindiscoveringjustwhatandhowmuchMaryCarsonhadowned，andingatheringthereinsofgovernmenttogetheronbehalfoftheChurch。